The Agony of Loneliness and the Bliss of Fellowship

Sometimes I find myself alone, feeling like nothing will ever change, like there is no one to talk to. I feel isolated and depressed - and for whatever reason just plain weepy and sad. Sometimes I feel like I have no friends...like they have all gone ahead of me and I have been left behind to scramble and fight my way all alone. Sometimes there are storms raging in my heart and mind and I wonder if God even knows where I am. A sort of restlessness overwhelms me and I want to scream, shout and fall into a heaving mess of sobs. "God!, who am I?!", "I don't want to go on in this place of isolation and loneliness!" I would say if I could even speak through the groans in my spirit. Then He comes, like a ribbon of hope and light into my darkness - if somehow I could just enter into that bliss. To be covered in the golden dust of the Holy Spirit's fellowship - I reach.....I reach.....closer, closer...